I awaken, my face is covered again. I hear two voices engaged in a celebratory conversation. They speak in English, but I have a hard time making out what’s being said. One voice is garbled and hard to understand. The only words I can make out are the interjections he emphasizes. The other voice is unquestionably Bobba Vick.
“I will bring him to you..”
The conversation ends and I hear a few clicks as I feel the ship hurl us through space.
“What are going to do with me?”
The feared killer walks over and takes the hood of my head.
“I’m taking you to see someone” The bounty hunter tells me.
“Who?”
“You’ll see when we get there. Now if you keep asking me questions we gonna have a little fun. For starters I’m gonna choke your ass a little, then I’m gonna…”
Suddenly an explosion rocks the ship’s cabin. It quickly fills with smoke and flames.
Boba Vick tightly grips the controls as he fights to keep the ship from crashing. We slam into the ground with a viscous thud. I see a light beam cut into the side of the ship, a piece of the ship is kicked in. Two of the most well known rebels in the FF galaxy enter; Brady Skywalker & Han Welker.
“What’s good, yo?” Han Welker looks in Boba Vick’s direction.
“Aw, yeah. We’ve been looking for your punk ass”
Welker aims his blaster at Boba vick.
Boba Vick hits a button on his belt and his jet pack propels him through a window out of the ship and into space.
“I’m gonna get that weasel” Solo informs his friend.
“Let’s worry about him later. We have to get this guy out of here”
Brady Skywalker offers me his hand.
“Brady Skywalker, good to meet you”
“I know you, you’re in those commercials.”
My comment aggravates Han Welker.
“Yeah, ask him how many times he’s lead the galaxy in receptions. He hasn’t done shit yet, and he’s getting seven figures to pimp fancy underwear. That shit doesn’t leave too much to the imagination, just ask your boy.”
“He’s not my boy. He’s just my sister’s boyfriend” Skywalker angrily tells Solo.
“Yeah, he’s your boy. Why you let him stay at your crib if he ain’t your boy?”
“You’re just jealous because you used to kick it with her, until she met him.”
“Yeah, he’s a catch, two hundred fifty pounds of dynamite with a ¼ fuse. Why don’t you go oil up your chest or something.”
The object of the debate walks into the ship. He is the mighty ChewHawka.
I’ve heard many tales of the mighty ChewHawka, he's an imposing figure. But, what the fuck is going on with his crotch? I become fixated with it as I fight the urge to stare at it.
“What you guys talking bout?”
Brady Skywalker scrambles for an answer as Welker giggles to himself.
“Stuff” Brady informs him.
“We were just talking about how we were sent on this mission by our master”
“Who is your master, and why is he interested in me” I ask.
“Um, he uh, kinda took an oath to get out of the war, so he sent us”
Not even the curious answers to my query about this mysterious master can take me attention away from ChewHawka’s crotch.
Jesus…I hope I wake up soon.
What kind of other whacky creatures will I run into next?
Find out in the final installment Episode VI...or is it Episode III, no it’s VI – Revenge of the Sloth!
No comments:
Post a Comment